nut hugger
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
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