my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
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