You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
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