There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
Randomize
