haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
