In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
Also. After puking outside of the bar last night, some guy (who saw me puking) said I looked like Jennifer Lawrence, called me J Law, got my number and is now texting me. Who knew puking and rallying would do me any good
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
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