I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
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