apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
Actions speak louder than pants.
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
Every fourth of July I get sentimental when I think back to the one where we drove around baked off our asses crashing multiple cookouts listening to Team America's "America, Fuck Yea" on repeat. I miss us.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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