I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
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