mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
Randomize
