I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
he's my edward cullen
I am pretty sure Edward Cullen never had an all-day drinking binge topped off with some blow.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
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