Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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