i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
I spent most of the stoned conversation with my dad proving to him that the Newfoundland is an actual dog and NOT a Snuffaluffagus-esque figment of my stoned imagination, while laughing over the fact there is actually a place caller Dildo, Canada. Have YOU taken time to be a good dad today?
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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