you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
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