my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
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