I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
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