I looked at my own cervix.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
23 Adults Confess The Irrational Fears They Had When They Were Kids
Realized I'm still to drunk to comprehend work emails. Marked them all as unread. Here's to responsible hang overs.
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
These 25 Women First Experienced Sexual Harassment At A Shocking Age
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
did you just send me my own nude
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.