Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
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I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
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Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
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