North Korea, Best Korea!
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
Randomize
