what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
Randomize
