I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
Randomize
