you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
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