I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
Randomize
