How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
21 NSFW Facts About Famous Celebrities That Will Blow Your Mind
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
These Are 19 of the Most Horrible Strangers People Had to Sit Next to
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
he had hair everywhere except his balls
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice