Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
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