Just saw my boss eat a banana in three bites.
Hey cutie is the game almost over? I'm making dinner for us it'll be ready soon. Xox
You would rather make fucking dinner than watch a hockey game that rivals the epic-ness of miracle, the one of the biggest upsets in sport history? Babe I don't know if I can date a girl with such terrible priorities.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
