I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
Randomize
