Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
