My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
You chucked an empty vodka bottle against the wall and yelled "Everyone calm the fuck down, it's just the cops." After 10 seconds of silence I looked over and saw you pissing their fountain.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
I left the office with a vacuum, 2 condoms and 300 dollars cash money. Tell me I don't have the most versatile job on the planet.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
Randomize