My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
The struggles of a small town man whore
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
