He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
She announced her abortion via fbk
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
How's work?
Spinning.
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
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