So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
I just projectile vomited in a Methodist church parking lot. If Jesus didn't love me before he sure as hell doesn't now.
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Randomize
