Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
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