Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
Randomize
