i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
Everyone I slept with in 2016 is getting a Christmas card from me. Because I'm an adult.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
Randomize
