She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
My early Valentine's Day one night stand just took an uber home. Thank you, technology, for letting me enjoy this day in peace. ðŸ˜
Coworker just walked in thirty minutes late reeking like weed and clutching a handful of scratch-off tickets. Also, there’s still a stripper pole in my office. Happy Wednesday!
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