Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
Randomize