I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
i think my cat just said my name.
IF THE GUY WHO I AM BORROWING OUR CAR FROM FINDS ONE CONDOM OR JIZZ STAIN IN THIS CAR HE IS GOING TO CASTRATE MY ASS. SERIOUSLY, DON'T FUCK IN THE CAR.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
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