I want to walk on stilts...naked
you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
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