Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
Randomize
