Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
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