Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.
She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
I wish they made helmets for livers.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
Randomize
