Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
Whenever you feel bad about your life, just remember the time I tried to swim while high and thought for a minute I was genuinely drowning
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
Randomize
