If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
I just conveyed my whole sex life to my mom over voicemail. Anddd, I'm hammered.
Top night. Top night.
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
Randomize
