What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
im calling her cock vulture from now on
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
THERE HAS BEEN GRANDTHEFT IN THE HOUSE. SOMEONE STOLE THE BABYWIPES AND YOU NEED TO BUY MORE BEFORE WE LET YOU IN. oh and you have to take two shots before we'll let you in. with no chaser.
Randomize