I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Randomize
