My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
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