that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
Randomize
