I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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