I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
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