making cat noises will not fix the situation.
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
You're wonderful. How are you always such a good friend?
50% genetics, 50% driven by a desire for people to drunkenly eat donuts at my funeral and then have fantastic cry-sex afterward.
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
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