This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
tell your sister to shave her snatch
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
Randomize
